I was doing so well with regular updates here! And then....I stopped. I will get back into writing regularly again! If I publicly commit like that, I have to do it, right?

I thought I'd write about Laura again today. Some of you are aware that in an attempt to motivate her to make good choices at school, I set a very high bar for her...if she could have 20 days in a row of good behavior at school, she would get her ears pierced. We got very close our first go around. If I remember correctly, I think she had 14 good days in a row! And then, she stopped.

So we began again. And again. And again. And again.

She started to get bad reports every day. In addition to bad behavior, though, she also was not doing her schoolwork. Previously, her academics really had not been negatively impacted. Sure, she might have to do her work in another room with an aide, but the work was done. That was not happening anymore.

We went to Open House last week at school. When her teacher saw us, she said, "I'm sorry I didn't have the chance to call you today." I replied, "It was that bad today?" Apparently, yes, it was. Her teacher told us that she has been completely unable to focus, has been incredibly hyperactive, swings her arms wildly, can't stand in line, plays in the sink's water (even rubbing the water all over her face), she jumps and twirls, the list went on and on. Her teacher expressed great concern that she was now struggling academically. 

At home, we have also noticed some changes. Laura has always walked high on her tippy-toes, but it has changed. She now prefers to walk on the knuckles of her toes. It looks incredibly painful, but this is her preferred method of transportation. She shows zero signs of discomfort and struggles to stop herself from doing it when we tell her to stop. 
She also makes strange noises with her throat and sinuses.  She suffers from severe acid reflux and has her entire life. I know what that looks and sounds like. This is different. We've also had some issues with a throat clearing vocal tic from ADHD meds. Again, this is something different. 

She bites her fingernails to nubs, picks and peels her toenails off, and refuses to let scabs heal. Here is a recent example of a scab that she has had for probably five months now. Warning: It's not pretty!
Picture
The scab itself is small--most of what you see here is dried, smeared blood. This was right before her bath one evening.
Her teacher has spoken to us about her scab picking before. She says that she tries to limit her to one band-aid a day, but then she ends up covered in blood, like this. We have seemed to find a way to help though--finally! Tom has been putting liquid bandage on it. It stings, and she doesn't like it. It's still not healed, but it's finally looking better. 

The way she was walking was so worrisome to me. I assumed it was a sensory-seeking behavior. She has always been fearless, impulsive, and constantly craving stimulation of some kind. I feared that she would now cause serious damage. I spoke to an OT (Occupational Therapist) while at Koby's ARD meeting, and she told me that she definitely would cause serious damage. 

I called our therapy company and requested an OT evaluation. It was conducted last week, and she will begin services in about two weeks. She plans to work on her fine motor skills and self-regulation skills. She may teach her how to brush herself. I'm eager for therapy to begin and am very hopeful it will help. She believes the noises she is making are another sensory seeking behavior--she suggested it could be a physical or auditory experience that she is getting from it. 

In the meantime, Laura has a psychiatrist appointment in two days. The major shift in her behavior came and continued after her last medication change. We are constantly trying to find the just-right formula for her. We are definitely not there. We are always trying to avoid the vocal tic from returning, but at this point, I'm wondering if the vocal tic may be something we have to accept if the medication is helping her to have better control of herself. We will discuss possible medication changes at the appointment. 

In addition, we are in the process of moving her out of play therapy and into cognitive behavioral therapy every week. It's a gradual process, but we are now having her in a weekly, one-on-one session. Before, she and Troy had joint or shortened bi-weekly sessions. I'm hoping that this will also help her.

All this to say--my beautiful daughter has some very real challenges. And though I am trying desperately to help her overcome them, some days, some weeks, I wonder if we will. I do know this: I love her far too much to give up. And I know she WILL get those ears pierced one day!